Thursday 13 December 2012

#9(0)

I came across this random piece of writing I had done in a notebook (I love to take notes the old fashioned way) and which was dated early September. It’s rather amusing (to me) so I’ve chosen to transcribe it verbatim (including structure, format, grammar and spelling) and post it here. Please enjoy my entirely natural neuroticism and my continuing journey to sensational senility.

07.09.2012.
Random ramblings while riding the rails. Via rails. Despite failing to acquire that which I came for (Police check), I had a very nice day in Ingersoll, particularly spending time with Oma & Opa, who are the most humourous people I know. And certainly wise with a lifetimes worth of knowledge and understanding of this crazy world we live in.
As Opa points out, life is far too short to waste worrying about things we can’t control or the sad state of society, and should rather be spent enjoying the simplicities of life.
- like the chick next to me doing organic chemistry on her laptop
- I really need to re-nerdify myself and start refreshing my knowledge of biology, science and world capitals.
- I’m slightly bothered by my current reliance on running as the defining aspect of my identity. I have become far too one-dimensional and have let go of many of my past passions and interests. While I cannot merely ‘step away’ from running, I need to do more to broaden the scope of “how I am” both seen by myself as well as by others.
- I feel I have a healthy, if not mildly offensive, sense of humour which rejects our societies obsession with political correctedness. I enjoy finding the humour in all things especially myself. Bc let’s face it: I’m pretty damn hilarious.
- So you want to be a teacher huh? Seems like a pretty stupid idea considering the current job market. But that’s ok. I’m sure I’ll do fine. But how can I be so sure…
Why I’ll be successful as a high-school teacher. Bc like most of the students, I don’t give a shit. Ok, maybe that’s not true. I do give a shit. I sincerely want to make a difference, no matter how small and insignificant that might be. Looking back, I’d say it was a handful of HS teachers that have led me to where I am right now and in some way, wanting to emulate them. Ms Hunter. Mr Mol. Mr Boin. These teachers made a difference and that’s really all that matters. So I’ll put up with all the PC, EDSJ bullshit for 10 months, smile and nod, try not to offend anyone, and I’ll do what it takes to make myself as ‘marketable’ as possible and perhaps even get a job one day.
And while we’re being optimistic, how bout thinking about some life goals… the things I want to achieve before I die (of which I’ll decide when and how) [ Note to self – really need to brush up on my English language skills: grammar, spelling, word definitions, etc, etc] So ya, life goals: So one day I’ll be a high school teacher. I’ll be good at it, make some powerful friends and earn just enough to justify the major headaches of dealing w modern-day youth. Maybe I’ll even become principal one day. SKINNER!
I also have my running goals which in short… are to run fast. Like sub 2:30 fast. Maybe sub 2:20 (that’s really fast!)
I plan to live in the country and run a hobby farm with pigs, sheep, goats, a cow or two, plenty of ducks, a big dog (Bernese) and perhaps a donkey.
I’d love to live a fairly long life which will continue on as long as I’m healthy (ie independently functionable).
Ok, that’s enough journal writing for today.

It then continues on the next page…

If I died today. If I died right now. That would be okay. Not that I want it to happen. But it would be okay if it did. I don’t want to die. Not now, not for a very long time. But I guess it would be okay. I’ve had a good life. A great life even. It hasn’t been perfect (what is perfect), nothing is perfect. It’s been the life I’ve chose to live and for that I have few regrets. I don’t ‘believe’ in a “other side.” I’m not even sure I would want to if it existed. Bc if it did, what would be the point of being here now. I hope this is all there is. That way, I can/will be sure to make the most of it (most of the time). I’ve been here for 25 yrs. I still have many more to go. Let’s be sure to make them count. To make the most out of everything. Always.

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